She gasped, sagging into a chair.

#1 - I have completed my sentence...I mean assignment, at the R.C.'s festival.

The merriment continues in festive downtown Denver, but I'm not scheduled to partake of any more of it. I did 23 hours in 2 days and that was more than enough. I'm too old to do that kind of thing. Especially without six months to gear myself up for it mentally. And maybe drugs.

I'm going to babble on about it at length, so feel free to skip to #2.

The experience didn't start out auspiciously. I was booked in to the H*l*d*y Inn, a chain I'd never book on my own money, and when I called for directions, I reached a very silly woman.

Me: "I'm booked into your hotel and I've never stayed there before. I've just arrived in downtown Denver and I was wondering if you could tell me where the entrance to the parking garage is?"

Her: "It's right beside the gift shop."

I ask you. Is that a useful response?

My meal in their restaurant that evening made me vilely sick. (I should have been suspicious when my soup course didn't arrive in a timely fashion. When I was served my entree, I asked about the soup and was told they were, "heating it up.") In consequence, my entire digestive system was upset for the next two days, but not to any debilitating extent. Also, the H.I. wasn't as gross as it might have been because I was only there to sleep and bathe. It was pretty gross, but it would have been worse if I'd had a lot of spare time and been stuck there for hours.

In spite of being scheduled for 10 and 12-hour shifts on my two work days, I was only scheduled for one 30-minute lunch break each day. That could have been a problem, especially Wednesday, when I downed two venti lattes before 10:00 a.m., but there were intervals of calm that I used to good advantage. (The ladies' room was a mere 50 feet away.)

The R.C. took very good care of me, too. She met me for breakfast my first day (possibly to check and see if I was recuperated sufficiently to work) and walked me to my work station. She also lunched and dinnered with me (we dined with another temp, Sweetest, who was at loose ends and towards whom I was already feeling an astonishing gratitude for the amount of time she'd spent helping me with my constant software issues) on Tuesday but by Wednesday, our schedules were already going in completely different directions. (I'm whining, but what she was doing made my job look like a picnic.)

The work itself? As I explained to all and sundry last night, the company asked me if I'd like to come in and earn some more money doing that work. No one asked me if I'd be good at it. (Had they asked, I'd have answered honestly. No.)

As it turns out, I wasn't. Good at it, I mean. Oh, I was fine with the people part of the thing. Meeting and greeting and getting people through the registration line with dispatch and courtesy. But my accounts never balanced at the end of the day.

30 years ago I had a very brief career working at a bank. The reason it was very brief was because my cash box never balanced at the end of the day. You'd be surprised how cranky that kind of things makes a banker. I know I was.

Thanks to the courtesy, expertise, and all-around fabulousness of Sweetest, I wasn't required to hang out there until midnight each day struggling with the problems I'd created. At the end of each shift, she kindly took my papers and beat them into shape. (One day she did it for me mid-day, correcting the problems I'd already introduced into the equation. I must admit she wasn't best-pleased to discover that I was still off at the end of that day. I seem to have discovered ways to misuse their proprietary computer program never before explored in the history of their company.)

I even had my own assistant to help with the more routine parts of the task, which should have allowed me to focus on doing my data entry more carefully.

Sadly, although she was in every other way a jewel, said temp was inclined to bossiness and wanting to do things her way and not the company's way. Although I hate a conflict more than anything else in the world, by Wednesday morning I was forced to draw her aside, tell her that she was proactive, hard-working, cheerful, great with the registrants, and a lot of fun to be around. And that she was also and unfortunately inclined to argue with me in front of the registrants, which Would. Not. Do. On matters of where we were to apply the rules rigidly and where we were to be flexible, I was and had to be the last word.

(This isn't me control-freaking, although I know it sounds like it is. Her organization makes a lot of money offering temps to help at big shows. I thought it was important that any decision that had to be made that might be wrong and cause problems in the future should be unquestionably not her fault.)

(Also? If the registrant can get the people behind the desk arguing about what can or can't be done, they've won. No matter how rigidly the rule should have been applied, they know they're going to get a free ride. Considering the amount of money it costs companies to provide staff for on-site registrations for people too lazy or disorganized to register in advance, on-site registrations really need to be discouraged.)

What else? Oh, yes. I'm not a morning person, something I might have mentioned ten or fifty times in the past. It's a bit...disconcerting...for me to be faced with 700 very anxious registrants at 6:30 a.m., all of whom need to get their badges and info and be on a bus by 7:00. Technically, helping them wasn't my job but even if not asked (very politely and anxiously) if I "minded" giving a hand, I doubt I'd have been able to sit at my own station and ignore the throngs. It's a tribute to the experience and slick organization of the R.C.'s company that they handled the situation with ease.

(It remains a mystery to me why organizations don't build a 48-hour window into their schedules and just mail the pre-registered attendees their information, but not a big mystery. People would lose or forget stuff and anyhow, having worked behind the scenes for the last three months, I understand that those responsible for organizing the show cannot beg, whine, bribe, or force the necessary information out of others a single instant before the last one.)

In closing, let me say that I don't think I've ever worked with a nicer bunch of people than the R.C.'s group, and that I never want to see any of them again.

(Except Sweetest, someone I'd hire in an instant for any position I had available that might interest her.)

Moving on....

#2 - I'm employed!

Buehler is not yet at a place where he can pay me, but the sister company of Bernie, the Tweenybopper, and DiamondGirl is in need of assistance. It seems that the Tweenybopper and her twin sister are moving to Philly. Thus, a replacement is required.

Of all the options in front of me, working for Bernie was the least attractive, but I told myself I'd work for whomever (Whoever? That's a tricky one.) came through with an offer first and he beat out Alvin by 24 hours. Also, since he can't quite yet pay me what Buehler was paying, I have the option to switch to Buehler in the future if I choose to.

I haven't yet broken the bad news to Alvin.

So far, Bernie and I have had two extended chats about the evils of micromanaging people. We'll see if any of my boulder-like hints made an impression.

(I remember a time when having three men vying for my favors meant I was going to get laid. Is it a sign of maturity, venality, or just old age that I'm willing to settle for money these days?)

Anyhow. I was right to tempt the fates by scheduling Escapade. I start for Bernie on the 13th of this month but he knows I'll be out of town the 23rd through the 28th. (I always schedule an extra day off at the end of Escapade, just to revel in the renewed Fannish Love.)

I have the next ten days off and I intend to spend them relaxing, a thing I haven't been able to do much of during my stint of so-called unemployment. I am going to treat it like a vacation.

3 - Starting today...because I just this second realized that if I'm employed, I can shop!

As soon as I have the strength to get out of my easy chair, I'm putting on shoes and going to the bank to deposit the $700+ in paychecks that I didn't get around to depositingn last, week, then I'm going to hit a store.

I'm not sure what store, but a store!