It isn't as though job opportunities do not abound in Denver.

For instance, I could earn up to $15/hour having phone sex.

I found a position that exactly describes what my experience is...and they're offering $10k a year less than I'm making now. Which was not at all encouraging.

An astonishing number of people are offering "management" jobs of one type or another that, when you read the job descriptions, are really just sales positions.

Those companies looking for an "office manager" whose job descriptions include a demand that this person be able to troubleshoot and maintain their networks? Need to get their meds adjusted if they think they're going to hire someone to open the mail, order office supplies, and set up a firewall for $26k.

A university is offering me the chance to organize the lives of its student but teenagers make me tired and I'm not really bossy enough to find the idea tempting.

I could be a meeting planner for a management consulting firm if I knew anything about meetings other than avoiding them and if they were paying more, which I don't and they're not so I don't even know why I bothered to read the ad.

I find it unsettling to see an ad for a funeral director accompanied prominently by the words, "no experience necessary."

I could be a "measuring specialist" but nothing I measure something comes out the same twice, so that's probably not an ideal career path for me.

I'm learning many things. For instance, I'm learning that the appearance of the fifteenth ad from one company, even for different positions, makes me uneasy.

Also? The number of companies I wouldn't work for because their industry bores me or I think they're evil is larger than I'd suspected. Our society seems to require an astonishing number of industries to function, many of which (I suspect) fall into The Hitchhiker's "telephone sanitizer" category.

The internet is creating a larger demand for 24/7 workforce than I would have guessed. An astonishing number of internet-related or internet-enabled industries are beginning to staff an astonishing number of positions to meet demand during a 15-20 (or 24) hour workday.

How desperate would you have to be to be scrolling through your filtered job list and click on a link that says, "several positions available!"

And who do they think they're fooling? Half or more of the "assistant" ads on the site have included in the job descriptions the information that it is the low-paid assistant's job to make sure the high-paid management and executive staff do their jobs. I tell you...this county's economy would collapse without the Admin Assistant.

Be not fooled, gentle readers. As a matter of fact, I do have work to do today. And I've been doing it, which is doubly astonishing. But, having not heard back from Coco, I've decided that it's time to let the job hunt commence in earnest. I've bookmarked 15 jobs. Tonight...the resume.